My Heart Has a Hole in It
By April Krubally
My heart has a hole in it!
I thought I was protected by a friend.
I held this person so high in my
hierarchy of need only to realize
this person never existed.
I built an absent entity in my
thoughts as permanent but quickly
learned it to be a ghost.
I kept this minion alive for quite a
long time and now I am tired! So
tired of carrying this entity around.
I must escape and run fast away
from the pain… it is unbreathable.
It hurts to swallow…
I must set this vapor free…
Not another moment can pass with
this entity in full form.. Maybe I have
been in love with an idea..
I keep replaying this emptiness and
the pain in my mind of not having
this entity around. I feel so alone in
my thoughts, no one to share this
I need to cry so to release the
molten sandstone of emotions,
my breath is short and spaced
I am remembering… slowly…
I am that I am…
I am light,
High vibrational love energy,
I am a song…
A song of wonder and full of
Oh, I had forgotten all of that which
makes me soft and flexible.
Humble and gentle,
Broken but not shattered
Alive and dead in the same moment.
I am the light.
I am the light and the dark.
A brilliant beam.
I am light and dark, joy and sorrow, good and bad, free and bound, I am that I am.